T I D A

In what became coined as the Shakespearean Era of my freshman year, that time period was really…whack, to say the least.  Anyways, Courtni and I can laugh about it now but it was actually kind of hard to go through.  Especially since the climax of it was on my birthday.  

I should be studying for my Chem midterm tomorrow.

Just got a text from someone who hasn’t texted me in a while.  To be honest, I barely miss the guy.  That’s what’s really nice about college.  You can actually choose your friends.  The people you choose to spend time with are the people you genuinely care about.  

I’m secretly excited for Friday night which I know is kind of dumb, but it’s the one thing that really helps me when I’m feeling stressed out.

Everyone should have a cuddle buddy.      

Last night was Sun God and it was really nice just hanging out with the guys + Courtni.  It’s the one day where everyone goes crazy/dgafs about EVERYTHING.  That kind of thing is always good once in a while.

I read my last post and that reminds me.  Of course, it’s kind of hazy since I was sleeping, but I definitely remember him telling me he thought I was cute.  Then maybe around 8, he asked me to stay.  I really like where we are.  Admittedly, sometimes it drives me crazy and I won’t stop bitching about it to Vincent.  

But for the most part, it’s just nice having someone.

Trpta asked me how I could take him so seriously.  But I was thinking about it, and he’s really different when we spend time together alone.  

Either way, I don’t wanna think too much into it.  I know things like this never work out but we’ll just deal with it as it comes along.              

Out in the suite studying and I overhear Nathan tell Phuong, “You’re really cute when you’re tired.”

I felt like a total creeper because I couldn’t stop smiling. It was so sweet because it was the first thing he said after probably an hour of complete silence. He doesn’t even know who I am besides the fact I’m her suitemate.

Yash is listening to music again and it makes me happy.

Also seeing dogs on campus never fails to make me smile. I get to go home tomorrow and I am so, so excited.

It’s 2 in the morning and I have a midterm tomorrow.

Lena talked to us today about being connected to who we are by continuing to do the things we love, no matter how crazy things get.  Coming from a TA as hard as her, I appreciated it.  That and Professor Johnson’s pep talk.

This late at night, I usually find Yash in the bathroom listening to music.  Big headphones on, quietly standing in front of the sink.  At first I thought it was kinda weird.  But now I really like that it’s her thing.  It helps her unwind.  I really respect that.  So tonight, I started dancing.  It sounds really dumb but I started dancing in front of Yash.  Then I came out into the hallway and danced a little more.  I’m just so happy.

I’m looking out my window and thinking, I’ll really miss this view.  I’ll miss the times I’ve creeped on people walking to the market, the times my friends have called me from outside the window, the times where I saw raccoons scurrying around.

I’ll miss ERC, I’ll miss the convenience of living right next to Cafe V.  I’ll miss late night market runs, Bistro dates, hating how far ERC is when walking back from class.

My freshman year has been eventful, amazing even.  Made terrible decisions, cried, laughed, spent too many nights “yolo-ing.”  I went through things I would have never thought I’d ever have to go through.  Things I don’t ever plan on telling the people I knew in high school because it’s extremely unexpected of my character.  But that’s college for you.  It changes you in ways you didn’t think were possible.

Nick told me he wished he could say the same about his freshman year.  I think a lot of people wish they could.  But I honestly believe I just got lucky.  Lucky that I met my best friend this early in the year and lucky that I had the opportunity to experience what I went through.  I’m so effing thankful for my parents <3

EVERYTHING.  All the good and bad.  So thankful for getting into my Russian lit class, for having Debs as my roommate, for Courtni and her infinite kindness and love.  For getting super drunk, getting on probation, sleepovers at the beach, staying up until 5 with Johnny, kissing G, meeting Liberman, meeting Mikaela through Marie, crazy suitemates etc. etc.

Things happened for a reason, and that’s exactly why I am here.

I think I talk about Courtni too much in my posts.  I love my slavic muscat slave (:  Seriously, SD would not be the same without her.  

Yesterday I saw Corey and he kept looking around as if he was looking for someone.  When I asked him what’s up, he said he thought it was weird that I wasn’t with Courtni.  I lol’ed and told him I had a life that existed without Courtni.  But then it made me happy that people know we’re always together <3  She’s obsessed with me, and most days she can’t help it ;D  

#bestfwend :3

There was a gif I saw online that made me think of EXACTLY how I feel whenever I’m with him.   

When we went to go pick up Abu from the airport last night, Vincent and Joseph kept asking me what I wanted.  I told them I didn’t know but by saying that, it occurred to me that I did know.  I knew exactly what I wanted.

And it’s hard.  It’s easy to deal when we don’t see each other but the moment we do, things go back to what they were like before.  

I like when he discreetly touches me and says cuddling with me helps him feel relaxed.  I’ll shut up now.